Overachieving Tumors

by Val

We saw Dr. Chemo Man yesterday and he had the pathology report back from surgery. We received a bit of unexpected news. The two masses in righty were larger than expected. That alone changed staging. I am now considered Stage 3a. We thought they took 1-3 lymph nodes during surgery but found out they took 9. Two of the nine came back as positive. Going into surgery we thought the lymph nodes were likely clear.

What does this mean as far as treatment?  Moving up to stage 3 and having lymph node involvement opens the door for trying to get a PET scan to see if there is any other cancer. Insurance determines if that will happen. If it will not then he will work around it with a CT scan and a bone scan. This isn’t because we think it is somewhere else, it’s let’s make sure it isn’t.

Chemotherapy will happen. Likely to start in January. Why January?  It’s because I am still healing from surgery and need the drains out before we do another procedure for the port.

Radiation may be back on the table after chemotherapy. I have to meet with a radiation doctor to determine that. If it is needed it will be after chemo.

Honestly, all this news took my breath away a bit. I’ve inquired about some remedies for anxiety and I will follow through because the weight on my chest feeling has returned.  

Carl brought me back to reality after leaving the office because sometimes I may be a bit dramatic and think the worst. I’m so glad he was with me.

What’s the positives here?

  •  7 out of 9 nodes were clear. 
  • PET scans means more information and quicker response if there is more cancer somewhere else. 
  • I will get the honor of breaking in Siteman’s new facility in O’Fallon. Wonder if I will get to sign a brick or something?
  • If age is just a number then my head is already telling me that stage is just a number too. I’m healthy and I am on the road to being healthier.

Now let me tell you the power of people in my “Val Squad” and whatever divine force you believe in. I was scared yesterday and I cried as we left the doctor’s office. Nobody has ever told me the % numbers but I’ve seen them on Google. I know what moving to stage 3 means. I was focused on that as we were leaving and Carl was loving me through it.

Tears were drying as we pulled out of the parking lot. I pulled up Facebook to distract myself. A friend shared a post into the group. I read it out loud to Carl and told him I think the universe is trying to tell me something. The message I heard loud and clear was get up girl, we’re not done here. Earning a Wonder Woman cape isn’t supposed to be easy and you don’t do it on your own.  I thought to myself exactly what I put on her post.

“Oh you don’t know who I am cancer. Let me show you who I am!”

Very Sassy Val

Few have seen when this level of sass comes out. It’s a sight to see, often comical but I’ve found it to be effective. 

My friend had no idea where her post was going to hit or when but yet it hit exactly where it needed to.  In all aspects of life you never truly know when what you say or do makes all the difference to someone. So if you think it but hold back on saying it…let it go. Say it. They may need it at that exact moment and that is why you are being drawn to the thought. I am talking about constructive things. I’m not encouraging you to turn off the filter that may be very necessary. Use the power for good or some Jedi woo woo like that. 

Drop the seeds, give the compliment,  or step outside that comfort zone to lift another. For every one that thinks “weirdo” when you do, there are 10 more that you reach at just the right moment. 

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